Finding your own path

Sherrie Laryse is an author, teacher and scientific yogi who teaches emotional intelligence. Her first published book, ‘On Path’ is a beautiful story about her journey of following her path in life, highlighting some difficulties she faced and how she adapted her thinking to consider that what was initially thought of as missing was actually showing up in other ways.

In your book, you talk about the desire to become a mother. What does mothering or being a mother mean to you?
I went through a process of defining the kind of mother that I wanted to be. I defined it as somebody who inspires, nurtures and mentors. As soon as I defined those three things, I could look for where they showed up in my life.

I love the idea that nothing is ever missing from our lives. Do you think there is too great an emphasis on children being the major legacy that people can leave in their lives?
Having a child is an innate legacy – it’s what we do to keep our species alive, so it’s the ultimate biological legacy. Because of this fact, it’s common for people to put the spotlight there and not recognise other legacies as readily. 

Do we allow labels such as ‘parent’ to define us too much? Is that how we make sense of the world or is that how the world makes sense of us?
A little bit of both. We need to know who we identify as so we know how to relate to the world. We need to use our labels to guide us to act appropriately in different situations. The paradox is that we are so much more than these labels. We need to recognise these labels, but if we think that’s all we are, that becomes a very limiting belief to hold about ourselves.

I like to think of it as having a dual passport. We have one passport that says I’m in the world, I’m in this body which comes with a whole lot of labels and is how I represent myself. But then I also have this other passport which says I am completely unrestricted. I am so much more than this body and these thoughts. I think labels are functional. Beyond the practical, functional aspect of them, we need to realise that we are so much more than labels.

The themes of perception and gratitude come up a lot in your book. I wondered whether it’s possible to build gratitude like a muscle?
Definitely. Habitual thinking is strengthened through neural pathways. Gratitude as a habit will build this mental muscle. The more you build the habit and specifically find things that you are grateful for — and not just positive happy things, but also the challenging aspects in life — the more you start building that muscle.

What would you like people who have read the book to take away from it?
I would like them to find a sense of appreciation and love for being exactly who they are. To appreciate all the twists and turns of their life, to find the benefit in all of it, and then ultimately arrive at a state of gratitude for their life being exactly what it is. So, a state of gratitude for themselves, their life and everything that it has been.